It’s been almost a year since I last posted anything. Time flies, especially when you are having fun. At least that is what I’d like to believe. The last year or so has been a roller coaster of sorts. It’s had both highs and lows for me. The several near misses followed by the signing and the making of MASTANG MAMA (50% mast, 50% tang) have all contributed to make the last 12 months huge for me.
We are now nearly done with MASTANG MAMA’s shoot and things are looking good. It is a small fun film that should have the audiences in splits. As I head into the post production there are a million small anecdotes that come to mind. Maybe on another day when I have more time I will share some of them. At this point I am confused about how to feel. I am happy with the way things are going but the sense of insecurity and anticipation of things to come keep the tensions levels high. I hope to post more, if possible on a weekly basis. That way I will have a record of all I felt while MM was happening.
Saturday, June 28, 2008
Monday, July 9, 2007
The Business of films!
It is easily the most frustrating business one can be a part of. I have, in the recent past, been interacting with some of the leading lights of the Hindi (Bollywood) film industry as well as working on scripts for some Hollywood based production companies.
Here are some of the observations. Most are true for Bollywood but I was surprised to find a lot of them were true for Hollywood as well.
1. Most producers are illiterate. This was served first up and was the most shocking truth. Many of the producers I have interacted with have no concept of reading a script. Nearly everyone I have met has asked me for a script. But these scripts have never been read. They are carried from shoot to shoot, from office to home and back to office in the morning. But none of the producers who have personally requested my scripts have got around to reading it.
2. Some of the producers have readers who read scripts and write comments/coverage. This is supposed to be the ‘pipeline’ that ensures a steady of quality scripts are processed upwards. However this is only in theory. Being illiterate the producers seldom read these comments. Scripts with glowing recommendations lie around waiting for the producer to say yes. This part is especially true for big studios where lame scripts are developed by hacks for delusional acting talent that’s on their payroll.
3. Most readers are wannabe writers. While they wait for their big chance they read and write coverage in order to survive. Nobody understands the frustrations of a script writer more than they do. Not only do their script go unread their coverage too is totally ignored.
4. The only way to get a producer to make a film out of a script is for him/her to ‘own’ it. The producer must believe that this is the one story that needs to be told and s/he must tell it. The story must connect at a very basic level. Either it works off the one page synopsis or it doesn’t get made at all.
5. Nobody has the time for great cinema. Most producers/production executives are happy with very basic level of scripts. Great writing means different things to different people. Producers don’t see writing in the same way as we do.
6. Above anything else the story you are pitching must have been done before. There should be a definite ‘model’ that the producer can identify with. So it is okay for a story to be a bit like ‘Godfather’. If the story is not like a successful film you are in deep trouble. A clear path to recovering the investment is necessary. Producers hate to get involved with scripts that need them to take a chance.
7. Most independent producers, even those with impressive credits, do not have access to movie stars. In the last 6 months I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard “it is a good story and we would like to get into it, do you have a star?” Producers love nothing better than a ‘sealed deal’. If I were a drinking buddy of George Clooney I wouldn’t need to knock on producers doors. A small fact that they seem to miss.
8. Being a drinking buddy to a star gives you a much better chance of getting a film made than having the best crafted script in the world. Twice I have been told to ‘sell’ my script and let a moron director do the film. The moron director was doing joints with a major star while I was just typing a bunch of words on an old computer. That he didn’t have a script was the only stumbling block for him.
9. Bollywood special - Producers never say no. That they don’t say yes either means that you as a writer keep hanging on forever. Recently I have asked for my script back from 7 different producers, some had the scripts for as long as 18 months. I had to be rude to some of them but I guess it is okay. All 7 scripts have come back to me in pristine quality. Almost as good as new. Proving once again that they had never been read.
10. Formatting doesn’t matter in the least bit. Recently I’ve had two Hollywood based producers send me stuff to rewrite that was all over the place in terms of formatting. Their concerns were mostly about the story and how it moved. The only format Nazis I’ve come across are mostly wannabe writers stuck in minor details.
11. All the “Vice Presidents” and "Head” film development in the business collectively cannot mount a film. I suspect they may not be able to even buy toilet paper for the office without a committee having to ratify their decision. This is a pretty awful indictment of the way this business is run. But anyone who is in the business will tell you that it is true. The minute you see a card that proclaims “VP” or “Head” it should be your cue to excuse yourself. It took me between 6 months to a year of dealing with half a dozen of such professional to figure this one out. Films are made by guys whose card reads “Producer” or “President” or “CEO” or “Chairman”. Everyone else in the development process is just pushing paper.
So what is the way forward? I don’t know, keep at it I guess. Keep going till you find that elusive breakthrough. But be aware that you could die trying.
Here are some of the observations. Most are true for Bollywood but I was surprised to find a lot of them were true for Hollywood as well.
1. Most producers are illiterate. This was served first up and was the most shocking truth. Many of the producers I have interacted with have no concept of reading a script. Nearly everyone I have met has asked me for a script. But these scripts have never been read. They are carried from shoot to shoot, from office to home and back to office in the morning. But none of the producers who have personally requested my scripts have got around to reading it.
2. Some of the producers have readers who read scripts and write comments/coverage. This is supposed to be the ‘pipeline’ that ensures a steady of quality scripts are processed upwards. However this is only in theory. Being illiterate the producers seldom read these comments. Scripts with glowing recommendations lie around waiting for the producer to say yes. This part is especially true for big studios where lame scripts are developed by hacks for delusional acting talent that’s on their payroll.
3. Most readers are wannabe writers. While they wait for their big chance they read and write coverage in order to survive. Nobody understands the frustrations of a script writer more than they do. Not only do their script go unread their coverage too is totally ignored.
4. The only way to get a producer to make a film out of a script is for him/her to ‘own’ it. The producer must believe that this is the one story that needs to be told and s/he must tell it. The story must connect at a very basic level. Either it works off the one page synopsis or it doesn’t get made at all.
5. Nobody has the time for great cinema. Most producers/production executives are happy with very basic level of scripts. Great writing means different things to different people. Producers don’t see writing in the same way as we do.
6. Above anything else the story you are pitching must have been done before. There should be a definite ‘model’ that the producer can identify with. So it is okay for a story to be a bit like ‘Godfather’. If the story is not like a successful film you are in deep trouble. A clear path to recovering the investment is necessary. Producers hate to get involved with scripts that need them to take a chance.
7. Most independent producers, even those with impressive credits, do not have access to movie stars. In the last 6 months I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard “it is a good story and we would like to get into it, do you have a star?” Producers love nothing better than a ‘sealed deal’. If I were a drinking buddy of George Clooney I wouldn’t need to knock on producers doors. A small fact that they seem to miss.
8. Being a drinking buddy to a star gives you a much better chance of getting a film made than having the best crafted script in the world. Twice I have been told to ‘sell’ my script and let a moron director do the film. The moron director was doing joints with a major star while I was just typing a bunch of words on an old computer. That he didn’t have a script was the only stumbling block for him.
9. Bollywood special - Producers never say no. That they don’t say yes either means that you as a writer keep hanging on forever. Recently I have asked for my script back from 7 different producers, some had the scripts for as long as 18 months. I had to be rude to some of them but I guess it is okay. All 7 scripts have come back to me in pristine quality. Almost as good as new. Proving once again that they had never been read.
10. Formatting doesn’t matter in the least bit. Recently I’ve had two Hollywood based producers send me stuff to rewrite that was all over the place in terms of formatting. Their concerns were mostly about the story and how it moved. The only format Nazis I’ve come across are mostly wannabe writers stuck in minor details.
11. All the “Vice Presidents” and "Head” film development in the business collectively cannot mount a film. I suspect they may not be able to even buy toilet paper for the office without a committee having to ratify their decision. This is a pretty awful indictment of the way this business is run. But anyone who is in the business will tell you that it is true. The minute you see a card that proclaims “VP” or “Head” it should be your cue to excuse yourself. It took me between 6 months to a year of dealing with half a dozen of such professional to figure this one out. Films are made by guys whose card reads “Producer” or “President” or “CEO” or “Chairman”. Everyone else in the development process is just pushing paper.
So what is the way forward? I don’t know, keep at it I guess. Keep going till you find that elusive breakthrough. But be aware that you could die trying.
Saturday, March 17, 2007
Colour by numbers
Babel it was last night. Overall not a bad film to watch even though it was a study in how a bad to mediocre script was saved by a good director.
I was very surprised at the clichéd characters and the resolutions to their issues that were served up by the writers. Check these out:
1. Mexican nanny – Fat, matronly and slightly stupid but with a heart of gold. I’ve seen the same nanny character in god knows how many other films.
2. Mexican nanny’s Mexican nephew – shady and in some kind of trouble. Where have I seen this before? I wonder if every young man of Mexican decent fits into this category as Hollywood would have us believe ….
3. Brad and Kate – can’t find the love they once had, but will find each other and overcome their loss after a life threatening incident.
4. American tourists - self centered. They couldn't care less about someone dying on the bus. They would rather worry about the air conditioning.
5. Moroccan tourist guide - poor but heart of gold.
6. Moroccan old woman- all wrinkled and poor but has the right cure for the pain, and of course a heart of gold.
7. Japanese teenager – disconnected, lonely and unloved.
8. Japanese father – having trouble connecting with his child and still mourning his wife’s death. Eventually father and daughter will find a connection. 9. American kids- in mortal peril but will pull through miraculously.
I was very surprised at the clichéd characters and the resolutions to their issues that were served up by the writers. Check these out:
1. Mexican nanny – Fat, matronly and slightly stupid but with a heart of gold. I’ve seen the same nanny character in god knows how many other films.
2. Mexican nanny’s Mexican nephew – shady and in some kind of trouble. Where have I seen this before? I wonder if every young man of Mexican decent fits into this category as Hollywood would have us believe ….
3. Brad and Kate – can’t find the love they once had, but will find each other and overcome their loss after a life threatening incident.
4. American tourists - self centered. They couldn't care less about someone dying on the bus. They would rather worry about the air conditioning.
5. Moroccan tourist guide - poor but heart of gold.
6. Moroccan old woman- all wrinkled and poor but has the right cure for the pain, and of course a heart of gold.
7. Japanese teenager – disconnected, lonely and unloved.
8. Japanese father – having trouble connecting with his child and still mourning his wife’s death. Eventually father and daughter will find a connection. 9. American kids- in mortal peril but will pull through miraculously.
Monday, March 12, 2007
Borat and The Sea Inside
I must admit that watching these two films one after the other during the course of one night must rank as one of the worst film viewing decisions in the world. But the opportunity presented itself and as both films came highly recommended and I did not want to miss either.
Assuming ‘Borat’ to be the lighter and the more amusing option we saw it first. I don’t know what to say of the experience. The jokes got tiresome after about the first 3 minutes and my innings with the film lasted a total of 22 minutes. There are only so many times one can hear an unfunny joke. That the filmmaker thought references to Borat’s sister and her ‘Vagin’ as being funny enough to be repeated about 5 times in the first 15 minutes is a reflection of how bad the film was. But obviously I am missing something. This film was a huge hit internationally. Why and how is a question I will ponder over for a very long time.
In contrast ‘The Sea Inside’ was a beautiful film. This was another case of a Spanish filmmaker’s deft handling of a very difficult subject with consummate ease. There were no major tears or hysteria as the filmmaker went about telling his story in a simple and concise manner. There was a lot to say about a very touchy subject but the filmmaker did not resort to any melodrama or theatrics which one would normally associate with a film dealing with euthanasia. To take a really shocking and tragic incident and to deal with it in the most matter of fact way seems to the way with Spanish directors. Having grown up on tearjerkers from both Hollywood and Bollywood the Spanish way of making films comes as a breath of fresh air. Hats off to them for showing us another kind of cinema.
Assuming ‘Borat’ to be the lighter and the more amusing option we saw it first. I don’t know what to say of the experience. The jokes got tiresome after about the first 3 minutes and my innings with the film lasted a total of 22 minutes. There are only so many times one can hear an unfunny joke. That the filmmaker thought references to Borat’s sister and her ‘Vagin’ as being funny enough to be repeated about 5 times in the first 15 minutes is a reflection of how bad the film was. But obviously I am missing something. This film was a huge hit internationally. Why and how is a question I will ponder over for a very long time.
In contrast ‘The Sea Inside’ was a beautiful film. This was another case of a Spanish filmmaker’s deft handling of a very difficult subject with consummate ease. There were no major tears or hysteria as the filmmaker went about telling his story in a simple and concise manner. There was a lot to say about a very touchy subject but the filmmaker did not resort to any melodrama or theatrics which one would normally associate with a film dealing with euthanasia. To take a really shocking and tragic incident and to deal with it in the most matter of fact way seems to the way with Spanish directors. Having grown up on tearjerkers from both Hollywood and Bollywood the Spanish way of making films comes as a breath of fresh air. Hats off to them for showing us another kind of cinema.
Saturday, March 3, 2007
SEZ’s and Slum Rehabilitation
A major storm is brewing in a teacup with regard to both these ventures. While the SEZ’s are promising to become a national headache the Slum Rehabilitation projects in Mumbai are already mired in controversy. Though I don’t know why it should be so. Sitting on the sidelines I can see a solution clearly.
The way I see it the logic is simple: If someone lives on/off a piece of land he should be a partner in the economic progress that is planned on the land and s/he must have a stake in the process the same way that a builder or industrialist or new owner has. It seems terribly unfair that after accusation of land the profits enjoyed by the developers/industrialist should not be shared by the people to whom the land belonged in the first place.
We have seen in the past that whenever a big industrial complex or building project comes up land prices shoot upwards. The developers who buy the rights to develop the land make a killing. The new owners also make a killing as the prices keep moving up. But the man to whom the land belonged in the first place gets nothing of the new escalated prices or the economic development that follows.
If we want a peaceful and healthy development atmosphere we should look at establishing a partnership that allows the evictees to share the future rewards of development. The moment this kind of partnership is established everyone gains and chances of any opposition, politically motivated or otherwise, are minimal.
A simple two point compensation package should be worked out on these lines:
1. Give the compensation that you would normally do while accruing the land. This process is already in place.
2. In addition to the compensation package allocate a percentage of the projects shareholdings to the people whose land you are accruing as their investment in the project. This percentage is to be distributed in accordance of the individual land holdings and would be in the form of tradable shares.
Once the landholder becomes the promoter of the company that is starting the project s/he stands to benefit from any development that is undertaken on the land and stands to benefit in perpetuity. Also, these shares could be traded on the stock exchange like any other shares and the individual owners could decide in stay invested or exit as per their own convenience.
The way I see it the logic is simple: If someone lives on/off a piece of land he should be a partner in the economic progress that is planned on the land and s/he must have a stake in the process the same way that a builder or industrialist or new owner has. It seems terribly unfair that after accusation of land the profits enjoyed by the developers/industrialist should not be shared by the people to whom the land belonged in the first place.
We have seen in the past that whenever a big industrial complex or building project comes up land prices shoot upwards. The developers who buy the rights to develop the land make a killing. The new owners also make a killing as the prices keep moving up. But the man to whom the land belonged in the first place gets nothing of the new escalated prices or the economic development that follows.
If we want a peaceful and healthy development atmosphere we should look at establishing a partnership that allows the evictees to share the future rewards of development. The moment this kind of partnership is established everyone gains and chances of any opposition, politically motivated or otherwise, are minimal.
A simple two point compensation package should be worked out on these lines:
1. Give the compensation that you would normally do while accruing the land. This process is already in place.
2. In addition to the compensation package allocate a percentage of the projects shareholdings to the people whose land you are accruing as their investment in the project. This percentage is to be distributed in accordance of the individual land holdings and would be in the form of tradable shares.
Once the landholder becomes the promoter of the company that is starting the project s/he stands to benefit from any development that is undertaken on the land and stands to benefit in perpetuity. Also, these shares could be traded on the stock exchange like any other shares and the individual owners could decide in stay invested or exit as per their own convenience.
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Ideas alone don’t cut it
Last week a friend told me a really great idea for a film. In his mind it was the perfect idea and when I didn’t share his enthusiasm he was very disappointed. He kept telling me about the great visuals he was seeing in his head. Unfortunately they were all in his head and I was unable to see them the way he was seeing them. This happens very often especially with advertising guys who thrive on the short format which relies on communication of a single thought.
Writing for feature films is very unlike writing for advertisements where a random idea with a bunch of well executed visuals is enough to do the trick. In the longer format a great idea is only the beginning and in itself is not enough. It is the complete execution that makes or breaks the narrative. Taking an idea and shaping it into a 100 page script takes a lot of doing. In any case there are plenty of people who think the same way and have similar ideas, that is probably why ideas alone can not be copyrighted. For the same reason the fear that an idea will be stolen and made into a film is really unfounded. It doesn’t happen as often as is thought. It takes a lot of hard work to write an original script even if you have a cracker of an idea. Bollywood is famous in my opinion for adaptations from foreign DVDs and not for stealing ideas. And those of you who follow the Bollywood film scene will agree that most of the DVD adaptations are not very cleverly done.
Writing for feature films is very unlike writing for advertisements where a random idea with a bunch of well executed visuals is enough to do the trick. In the longer format a great idea is only the beginning and in itself is not enough. It is the complete execution that makes or breaks the narrative. Taking an idea and shaping it into a 100 page script takes a lot of doing. In any case there are plenty of people who think the same way and have similar ideas, that is probably why ideas alone can not be copyrighted. For the same reason the fear that an idea will be stolen and made into a film is really unfounded. It doesn’t happen as often as is thought. It takes a lot of hard work to write an original script even if you have a cracker of an idea. Bollywood is famous in my opinion for adaptations from foreign DVDs and not for stealing ideas. And those of you who follow the Bollywood film scene will agree that most of the DVD adaptations are not very cleverly done.
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
The Election Results
The election results today confirmed a long held belief for me. I believe that barring exceptions the next 15 years or so will see the party in power losing every major election. And this is going to happen regardless of performance or other populist measures that politicians adopt. The reasons are simple enough, India is changing very fast- for a small number it is progressing faster and they are getting ever richer. For the rest the lack of speed in progress (this is not be confused with no progress) when compared with the richer section is glaring and the government of the day will have to take the blame for it. And as every political combination is promising the same thing it is easy for voters to shift allegiance.
Knowledge that a party is only going to survive in power for one term can be both a blessing and a curse. A curse because there is no incentive for a politician do his job well if he knows that he is not going to survive the next election? But then I would not worry too much about the curse. When was the last time you saw an MLA or MP do a decent job in their domain? I would rather think of it as a blessing for honest politicians (I do hope politicians like Manmohan Singh take note of this) because it frees them from taking on populist measures in the name of vote bank politics. Why pander to vote banks if you know that you will only last one term.
Knowledge that a party is only going to survive in power for one term can be both a blessing and a curse. A curse because there is no incentive for a politician do his job well if he knows that he is not going to survive the next election? But then I would not worry too much about the curse. When was the last time you saw an MLA or MP do a decent job in their domain? I would rather think of it as a blessing for honest politicians (I do hope politicians like Manmohan Singh take note of this) because it frees them from taking on populist measures in the name of vote bank politics. Why pander to vote banks if you know that you will only last one term.
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